Funny Slogans

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Funny Slogans

Plumber:
 "We repair what your husband fixed."

On the trucks of a local plumbing company in NE Pennsylvania:
 "Don't sleep with a drip; call your plumber."

Pizza shop slogan:
 "7 days without pizza makes one weak."

At a tire shop in Milwaukee:
 "Invite us to your next blowout."

Door of a plastic surgeons office:
 "Hello, can we pick your nose?"

Sign at the psychic's hotline:
 "Don't call us, we'll call you."

At a dry cleaners:
 "How about we refund your money,
 send you a new one at no charge,
 close the store and have the manager shot.
 Would that be satisfactory?"

At a towing company:
 "We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows."

Billboard on the side of the road:
 "Keep your eyes on the road and stop reading these signs."

On an electrician's truck:
 "Let us remove your shorts."

In a nonsmoking area:
 "If we see you smoking we will assume you are on fire
 and take appropriate action."

On maternity room door:
 "Push, Push, Push."

At an optometrist's office
 "If you don't see what your looking for,
 you've come to the right place."

On a taxidermist's window:
 "We really know our stuff."

In a podiatrist's office:
 "Time wounds all heels."

On a butcher's window:
 "Let me meat your needs."

On a fence:
 "Salesmen Welcome, Dog food is expensive."

At a car dealership :
 "The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment."

Outside a muffler shop:
 "No appointment necessary, we hear you coming."

Outside a hotel:
 "Help! We need inn-experienced people."

On a desk in a reception room:
 "We shoot every third salesman and the second one just left."

In a veterinarian's waiting room:
 "Be back in 5 minutes, Sit! Stay! "

At the electric company:
 "We would be de-lighted if you send in your bill.
 However, if you don't you will be."

On the door of a computer store:
 "Out for a quick byte."

In a restaurant window:
 "Don't stand there and be hungry,
 come on in and get fed up."

Inside a bowling alley:
 "Please be quiet, we need to hear a pin drop."

In the front yard of a funeral home:
 "Drive carefully, we'll wait."

In a counselor's office:
 "Growing old is mandatory, growing wise is optional."